On Living Inadvertently

Mei Qing, Landscapes after Various Styles of Old Masters (1690), ink and color on paper (Artstor)

《归园田居 其一》marks the birth of a desire to change one’s circumstances; a change, not in terms of materialistic progress and loftier aspirations, but rather, the restoration of an innate inclination in the ways of living life. The protagonist of this poem understands himself to be a lover of nature and the natural who lacks the propensity for the more artificial societal conventions. He knows this to be true of himself but still undergoes an awakening from a long slumber in a metaphorical trap that he accidentally fell into. The poem leaves no direct mention of the struggle that led up to this final resolution for transformation, but it may most likely have been an arduous one, one that may have required much courage, for the road that lies ahead is radical against stereotypical norms. In either case, the decision was not an abrupt one, for, as a caged bird that pines for the free expanse of the skies and forests, and like a pond fish that yearns for the depths of ocean waters, so too the protagonist has longed to break away from the artifice of society and to return to the natural state of his soul: to live as his predispositions guide him to live.

Instead of idle fantasy and passivity, the protagonist takes action, withdraws from urban civilization and returns to the countryside where he calls home. He reclaims wasteland in an open field and settles down, contented with a small, fragile and organic thatched house surrounded by elm trees, willow trees, plum trees and peach trees, the beauties and fruits of nature that naturally provide shade and sustenance.

With a heart of anticipation and enthusiasm for change and a happier life in one’s own terms, it is common in human nature to look back at what one leaves behind, and to occasionally reminisce on what one had; hence “暧暧远人村，依依墟里烟。” Yet in such times of reflection into the past, one almost instantly regains composure as one turns attention to the environmental surroundings of the present. For the protagonist, reminiscence for a sense of human connection is dim and faint at best, as he enjoys the present solitude, tranquility, vastness and spaciousness of the expansive farmland, where even barking dogs at the end of a deep alley can be heard, and the cry of a rooster can travel over the top of mulberry trees. He delights in simplicity, for living on rural ground brings leisure and no frivolous distractions and business of the city.

For the time being, he is contented and asserts his conviction that, having been caged for too long, one must return to one’s natural state in order to be happy in one’s own way. Perhaps ironically, or at least paradoxically, it is only by leaving the freedom of the skies and forests and the depths of the oceans, and entering into a new, foreign environment that one will not only become fully aware of the value of what one has or once had – whether it is home, or a previous person, place, career, institution, or object – but also to better understand one’s disposition and desires.

Yet the will to pursue one’s own path is never perfectly smooth. The protagonist reappears in the second piece《归园田居 其五》as sorrowful with no explanation. Perhaps he is still getting accustomed to the increased absence of man around him, for he walks home alone on a strenuous and rugged path, difficult for walking especially when he relies on a cane, while forests fill his surroundings. En route, he almost inadvertently encounters a clear stream for him to wash his feet, to filter his newly brewed wine, and to pause and relax. He recovers high spirits and decides to invite a neighbor to partake in feasting on a chicken that he had with him. As the sun sets, he laments that he had just begun to enjoy himself, but nights are short and the day will soon pass for the next dawn. Away from the ‘trap’ (“尘网”) and the city, the protagonist still faces disappointment and sorrows about life, such as the brevity of time.

While nobody can escape suffering and despair in the world, the protagonist seems to master the way of inadvertent living as well as a mental and emotional autonomy in the third piece《饮酒 其五》. Although he leads a solitary life in the countryside, he remains very much a part of society and of the world, yet he is now living in a state of mental and emotional detachment from the hustle and bustle of the physical environment. It is not so much about the physical distance between urban and rural, or between particular places, but the 心境 of an individual, in order to experience internal peace, happiness and true meaning. Moreover, relinquishing deliberation in actions and daily agenda gives him the time and attention to freely do the things he likes, even something as trivial-sounding as plucking chrysanthemums, and to casually see a mountain afar. He is blithe and at peace and at one with himself and the natural surroundings, which he loves. “日落室中暗” in the second piece becomes “山气日夕佳” here: in both sunsets, he delights in the latter for he is mentally and emotionally distant from the melancholy of the world; even though another day has come and gone so quickly, the clouds and sunset are beautiful.

Amidst nature where he belongs and loves, and in his new attitude of living naturally – without intentionally and purposefully questioning and doing things, he learns to let go, to distance himself mentally and emotionally, and to approach things objectively as though he bumps across them naturally and effortlessly, in order that he may appreciate each thing to the fullest while preserving his purity and artlessness that is the natural state of the soul. 

If one effaces the categorical divisions between《归园田居 其一》,《归园田居 其五》and《饮酒 其五》by 陶渊明 to view them not as three separate poems but as three screens belonging to one single canvas, then the resulting unity that binds the parts together begins to unfold an allegory of a spiritual journey. Starting off towards living life on one’s own terms, one is filled with enthusiasm, great hopes and satisfaction. Several days into the voyage, perhaps due to haven’t been accustomed to the new environment, emotions fluctuate between woe and joy, but at the same time, one lives carefree without burden, intention, or agenda. Eventually, one achieves a state of emotional and mental stability from which one can then be attuned to the natural surroundings and experience something about the profundity of life.